She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
Randomize
