i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
The feeling are messing with the penis
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
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