she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
Randomize
