she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
Randomize