: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
He's like the fucking Houdini of bras. Not only did I not feel him take it off I didn't find it until two days later.
Woke up with a migrane, threw up blood, then my headache went away. I'm going to convince myself that it was just a bad batch of blood so I can drink again tonight
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
Breakfast-of-shame with my mother. I was in half of a sexy Mad Hatter costume. We had artisan bagels and judgement.
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
Randomize
