break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
Oh man I wish you'd been in the car w/ me today. I followed a school bus home filled w/ young boys and I flipped them off the entire way. They loved it.
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
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