Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
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