and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
Randomize