you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
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