Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
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