If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
Randomize