You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
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