i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
Randomize
