Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
I went to the obgyn with chipped nail polish.. Somewhere Beyonce was looking down, shaking her head, whispering "Not fierce."
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
I woke up only wearing a Breaking Bad "Los Pollos Hermanos" apron he got from Loot Crate next to a 3 empty bottles of Zima,Jolly Ranchers, and a jar of coconut oil. Fernet is one hell of a party starter
Randomize
