Is it bad that my booty call's snoring was more interesting than the sex we had last night?
Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
kristin has been a bad kristin
yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
After so many times of carrying your puked covered clothes home in a bag on a Tuesday morning, you begin to realize that Fucked Up Mondays aren't a real thing.
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
Randomize