Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
How external is "for external use only"?
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
Randomize
