I woke up in a strange girl's bed and rifled through her mail to get her name.
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
Randomize
