Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
We ran out of wine so we are trying the absinthe you brought over from Spain like 3 years ago. Please call me at noon tomorrow. If we die, its your fault
I spent part of my valentines extracting candy hearts from a woman's vagina. The entire time I was thinking "this job pays for my Mercedes. This job pays for my Mercedes. This job pays for my Mercedes."
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
Carson kissed me on my cold sore before I could stop him so I think I gave my kid herpes. Mom of the year. Just call me MOTY.
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
Randomize