I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
I just woke up in the back of his van. Bring me a sunkist.
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
I realized today that the only things I'm guaranteed to have with me at all times are lipgloss, condoms and a USB drive. hmmm...
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
Randomize
