I'm really into asian looking animals
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
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