Screwed.edu
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
Contents of my pockets this morning: phone, condom, one hoop earring, half a cheeseburger, lighter and a $87 receipt from tacobell. Time for work.
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
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