Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
Did we literally take a cab across the street
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
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