If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
Getting drunk before noon on a Tuesday. When did this become my life? Did you know that a six-pack of Smirnoff is 2 liters?
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
It's like, "you literally have no idea who i am but i definitely slept with your brother in your bed."
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
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