Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
I need a beard to bite.
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
Randomize
