I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
Training to be a housewife: cleaning the house and masturbating while cookies are in the oven.
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
Randomize