I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
Randomize