My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
Randomize
