so i was sitting on this guys lap, and we were flirting and everything right..well his phone kept ringing, turns out it was his pregnant wife...she had gone into labor..
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
Randomize
