I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
this morning's inventory: a top hat, two empty bottles of everclear, half a slim jim, cigars, tiara, pot necklace, and some fishnets. and that's just my purse.
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
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