My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
just got waxed at a place I havent been to in a while
woman didnt remember me then in the middle of waxing she announced that she just didnt recognize my face
I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
God I need to hump something, right now.
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
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