My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
I was desperate so I downed my birth control with balsamic vinaigrette...
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
Randomize
