her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
Dude, I just scraped frozen vomit from my rooftop
I really wish I could say this is a new low for you
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
When you went through airport security you asked if the could check if a baby was in there. That drunk.
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
We should install the 'help i've fallen and can't get up' buttons on our bodies for this weekend. Birthday weekend calls for extra measures.
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
Randomize
