I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
Let's just say that in a last ditch effort to avoid getting arrested I said to the cop "but I'm not even that drunk" and he proceeded to point out (in front of a crowd) that I had "fucking pissed my pants"
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
like, by the end of my shift people were asking if I'd sobered up enough to take a drink order yet. that bad.
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
Randomize
