U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
Randomize
