HIV tests are more positive than that guy
Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
Randomize
