Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
If I could pick any std, I would pick genital herpes. Seriously. Have you seen the commercials? The lady is riding a fucking bike, swimming, and on a date. I have a perfectly fine vag and all I do is go to the library.
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
Randomize
