He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
I have feelings that need drinking.
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
Randomize
