well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
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