Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
i just sent this text using only my big toe
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
No I don't want to see you. You're the reason that I'm going to need a new liver by the time I'm 30.
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Fine I’ll come with you but you better tell that guy to wear some longer shorts because the second I see a rogue nut I’m gone
Randomize
