but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
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