I like complaining with weaving words and complex sentences. It makes me seem more sophisticated and less bitchy.
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
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