Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
You know you're fucked up when you decide to pour fireball whiskey in your vegetable beef soup
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
to be fair i didnt know she wanted to sleep with me
WHY THE FUCK ELSE WOULD SHE DRAG A STRAIGT MAN INTO A VICTORIA'S SECRET CHANGEROOM GODDAMMIT
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