Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
My friend just got engaged and I'm setting vibrators on fire.
Your life rocks...
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
Randomize
