there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
She set fire to my carpet trying to power-dry puke covered cigs with Josh's blowtorch. How she found it in the garage is beyond me but if you bring her with you again I'll shoot you myself.
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
Randomize
