Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
I shouldn't be home alone with this much peanut butter and the dog. I feel like i'm being recorded to see when my desperation will peak.
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
Listen I'm tryna celebrate your divorce. Sometimes that calls for drinking on the toilet.
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
Randomize
