The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
tell your sister to shave her snatch
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
I feel like vodka or no vodka, you'd still be trying to button your cat into your comforter
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
I just took a dump to end all dumps. Other dumps have already written ballads about it. It was the Armageddon dump. Bruce Willis was there, it was awful.
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
Randomize
