i just google imaged poop.
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
Our kitchen sink faucet is leaking, so I set a pitcher under it to catch water for Kool-Aid tomorrow rather than turn on the faucet. The environment owes me.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
Randomize
