Got home from the bar at 4am. 100% sober, unlaid. Epic fail or responsible behavior?
Responsible fail?
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
Remind me again why sleeping with a coworker and his wife would be a terrible idea.
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Randomize
