I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize