seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
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