your thong is hanging out like whoa
You're a womanizer and a bitch.
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
Just threw up in a cup driving down the road because there was cop behind me and I didn't want to pull over. Not sure if winning or failing at life.
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
Randomize