remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
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